In this episode of The A-Ha! Method Podcast, we have special guest Jeremy Au join us to talk about public speaking. Jeremy goes beyond the traditional discussion about public speaking and expands on many creative elements and uses of public speaking through storytelling, improv, and even stand-up comedy.
Jeremy initially did not like public speaking as a kid and even shares an embarrassing story from middle school that haunted him for years. Then he grew to love it in college and finds himself using public speaking skills every day.
He has given many start-up pitches and presentations and watched many business pitches as an investor and venture capitalist (VC), and he provides some insightful tips for new founders getting started with their pitches. Jeremy shares his love for storytelling and using storytelling techniques to evoke emotions from your audience. He also discusses his improv journey and how it has helped him along the way.
Jeremy Au (区汉辉) is a VC at Monk’s Hill Ventures who invests in fellow founders who will transform millions of lives. He also spearheads MHV’s key initiatives from venture scouts to thought leadership. Jeremy hosts the BRAVE podcast and interviews trailblazing founders, investors and rising stars in Southeast Asia tech. His mission is to inspire thousands to build the future, learn from our past and stay human in between. He is also an angel investor in multiple startups across USA and Southeast Asia.
Jeremy cofounded CozyKin, an early education marketplace. He led the startup as CEO from 0 to Series A to acquisition by Higher Ground Education. Won Harvard Business School’s New Venture Competition and the MassChallenge grand prize. Incubated by Harvard Innovation Lab’s VIP Program and MIT Sandbox. Jeremy cofounded Conjunct Consulting, an impact consulting platform, and bootstrapped the social enterprise to profitability, over a hundred clients and thousands of trained impact leaders. He consulted across multiple Southeast Asia markets and China as a Bain management consultant. He also served as an infantry sergeant in Singapore.
Jeremy is a public speaker and panelist on entrepreneurship, leadership and community engagement. He has spoken for thousands across Harvard, Deutsche Bank, Singapore Global Tech Network, Boston SPARK Council, Institute of Policy Studies, Civil Service College and many others. Recognized by Forbes 30 Under 30 and Prestige 40 Under 40. MBA from Harvard Business School and double honor degrees in Economics & Business Administration from UC Berkeley.
Jeremy enjoys science fiction, improv, hiking, tea and being a dad with his family. He enjoys hearing from authentic founders, receiving podcast guest recommendations and new speaking opportunities.
Practice your next speech at our August practice sessions!
Each week the Speakers Alliance runs a FREE Public Speaking and Pitching Practice Sessions for people looking to improve their public speaking skills. Anyone who wants to practice a presentation, speech, sales pitch, social occasion speech, etc. is welcome to join and participate! If you do not have a speech or pitch prepared, you can still attend and listen to others practice and ask questions during the Q&A period.
Talks can be 5-6 minutes long. The panel will provide up to 3-5 minutes of feedback after your talk.
Full transparency: Gabe sent me this public speaking course to review before I started working with Speakers Alliance. I was a bit skeptical, thinking I already know a lot about general public speaking tips after 7 years in Toastmasters (Overconfident much?). What I learned from taking the course is: I still have so much to learn if I want to take my speaking game to the next level!
I’ve asked Gabe why he calls it the A-Ha! Method. Is the A-Ha! Method mostly about the way to organize presentations with the different A-Ha! moments per talk, or is it about his public speaking techniques and advice? He said it refers to BOTH. The A-Ha! Method was developed with the A-Ha! moments per talk in mind, but it is also refers to what he has learned in his career as a speaker—the many A-Ha! lightbulb moments he has experienced throughout his professional public speaking journey.
His advice and lessons learned can help us as speakers too, no matter where we are on our own speaking journeys. I appreciate the tips and lessons learned, so that I don’t have to make all those mistakes on my own. While I will certainly make plenty of mistakes, I can limit my “newbie” mistakes at least by listening to and learning from professionals who have done this plenty of times before me.
Here are some of the key tips and lessons I learned from this public speaking course:
Most Helpful Tips: Organizing and Editing
Organizing your speech using the A-Ha! moments
One way to organize your speech is think about your speech in Acts 1, 2, and 3 and then organize each act effectively with an A-Ha! moment, if applicable.
The A-Ha! moments are strategically placed in your speech and have a recovery period afterwards. The A-Ha! moments are those parts in your speech that make your audience get chills or the hairs rise up on their necks and/or they are 100% focused on what you are saying.
You have to be strategic about your A-Ha! moments though. If you place them one after the other in a bulleted list, they will get lost. You have to place them perfectly in your speech so the audience feels the effect. Then you can have a recovery period— not where you stop talking but where you keep reinforcing that idea without letting them lose focus on that idea. Then, you will ramp up to the next A-Ha! moment.
I have probably done something similar to this without even thinking about it, however I probably did not do it well or effectively by using the recovery periods. Lots of improvement to be made there!
The Speaking Event Checklist Resource
This was very helpful in understanding the amount of information you need to collect when scheduling your speeches with the event organizers. This is a great way to keep everything organized and make sure you have all the details needed before, during and after the event.
This checklist can be used for both paid and unpaid speaking events that you schedule and also for online and on-site presentations.
I plan to use this spreadsheet as I start booking more presentations! 😃
Most Relevant Tips: Slides and Virtual Talk Resources
Slides, Tech and Tactics Section
There are over 2 hours of content about slides, tech and tactics that Gabe uses to take his presentations and pitches to the next level.
Gabe suggests a general rule of 1 slide per minute and 1 idea per slide and explains this more in depth. I have worked on implementing this rule in my corporate presentations recently, and it has helped!
Watching this section, I realized how much work my slides need. I like to do a long list of bullets sometimes, and the main thing to remember with slides is to keep it simple.
I don’t put a ton of effort or thought into my slides. I know there is quite a debate about Powerpoint vs other presentation software. I feel comfortable using Powerpoint, but Gabe makes a good case to look into other presentation software and improve your slides with better images/graphics and less words and text.
Virtual Talk Supplements
There are 30 minutes of bonus content on this subject, which is very relevant right now of course.
Gabe has an excellent tip of restarting your computer and having a presentations user on your computer and using that for when you have presentations. This is such a simple yet powerful suggestion to help decrease the chances of computer freezes or hiccups. I have implemented this for my big presentations, and it has helped me feel more at ease!
Also, I always need a reminder about the eyelines and focus. I have a tendency to look at the gallery view. I know better, but that doesn’t mean I am always perfect at this.
Biggest A-Ha! moment when taking the course: The editing process!
Iterative and editing process
Learning about Gabe’s editing and iterative process blew my mind! Good speakers make it look so effortless that I forget how much time and effort they put into each talk. I know speakers spend a ton of time practicing their content, but this course made me realize I have some major improvements to make in this area.
Gabe recommends his iterative process over straight memorizing because it will make you come off more natural and authentic. However, just because it’s not memorized, doesn’t mean he is just winging it. He practices over and over and over again until he knows his material so well that he could do it with his prepared slides or without them. That’s impressive!
Recognizing the amount of organization and preparation it takes to do this job was very influential and helpful to me as I continue to grow in my career as a professional speaker. Even if you don’t want to be a professional speaker though, these tips are still helpful as you may have to give big presentations at work and conferences.
There are so many tips and tricks in the course, and it would be a really long article to write up everything I liked about it. I found the course so helpful in thinking about my professional career, and I realized I have so much to learn, which is a good thing! There are always ways you can improve your speeches and grow your craft, and that is very exciting to me!
Next Steps
I plan to go through the class again and take better notes and go through all the resources. The good part about the course is that it never expires or goes away once you purchase it.
The course is great for being able to organize your speeches better and effectively. However, you need to also practice these new lessons learned. Each month the Speakers Alliance runs a few FREE Public Speaking Practice Clinics for people looking to improve their public speaking skills and practice their material. We will discuss different public speaking topics, answer questions, and provide feedback for as many 5-6 minute presentations and pitches as possible. Your speech or pitch doesn’t have to be fully prepped or memorized. The practice sessions are a safe place for you to practice, get your ideas out there and learn.
We will be adding practice sessions each month. Follow us on social media for the most up to date announcements.
Check out the public speaking course on Udemy and join us for a practice session or two or three (as many as you would like!). Practice makes great progress, and Speakers Alliance is here to help you with all your public speaking needs and practice resources.
Each week the Speakers Alliance runs a FREE Public Speaking and Pitching Practice Clinic for people looking to improve their public speaking skills. Anyone who wants to practice a presentation, speech, sales pitch, social occasion speech, etc. is welcome to join and participate! If you do not have a speech or pitch prepared, you can still attend and listen to others practice and ask questions during the Q&A period.
Talks can be 5-6 minutes long. The panel will provide up to 3-5 minutes of feedback after your talk.
This week’s session is on Friday, June 25 from 12-1pm PT.
Those pesky filler words, such as um, uh/ah, like, so, but, you know can creep into our speeches and presentations without us even realizing it. Sometimes we use them a little too much in our speeches and it becomes distracting to our audience. Best practice is to limit your usage of filler words, but I think some trainings go overboard on this rule, making you think that you have to be perfect as a speaker by not saying any filler words at all. This is, of course, very hard to do.
Moreover, it’s unclear how the number of filler words impacts the effectiveness of your message, and I don’t think there’s any evidence to back up the foundational assumption either way.
At the end of the day, the most important thing that you can do as a speaker is to provide well-organized and well-delivered message(s) and content to your audience.
My first fight with filler words
Before I joined Toastmasters in 2014, I had no idea about filler words. I didn’t notice them when I spoke, and I didn’t notice when other presenters used them, even excessively. I remember joining Toastmasters and being simultaneously impressed and intimidated that they count filler words throughout the whole meeting. When I finally mustered up the courage to give my Icebreaker speech (4-6 minute introductory speech about myself), I had nine “umms,” although I am pretty sure I had more and the Er-Ah Counter was just being nice. I couldn’t believe that I had nine filler words in there—I couldn’t even recall when I had said them!
What I am sure I looked like while giving my Icebreaker in October 2014.
After that, I set the goal for myself to not have any filler words in my speeches—I did not want to be the main focus and call-out on every Er-Ah Counter Report at the end of the meetings! I was now aware of my filler words, which helped me to then fix and break my habit of using them. Every time I said an “um” in my subsequent speeches, I could see the Er-Ah Counter making a little tally mark on their paper. With this classical conditional training (say a filler word and sense the Er-Ah Counter counting it on their report), I slowly started to limit my use of the word “um” in my speeches. However, it would really throw me in some of my early talks. I would say an “um” and then be upset with myself internally and almost lose my train of thought. Sometimes I would even call out the use of the filler word in the statement just in case the Er-Ah Counter didn’t notice it.
By my 10th speech, almost a year later, I had ZERO filler words, according to the Er-Ah Counter’s report! This was a major accomplishment, and I was so proud of myself. But here’s where I got a little lost and misguided—I don’t remember anything about that 10th speech except that I didn’t have any filler words in it. Did I leave the audience with good content and a message they could relate to and remember later? Did I deliver it in a well-organized way to help the audience truly understand the message? I don’t know. I really don’t remember, and if I don’t remember as the speaker, I am sure the audience doesn’t remember either.
I was so focused on accomplishing my zero filler words goal that I forgot my ultimate goal of a speaker—to provide an understandable and insightful message and content to my audience. I forgot about my audience and really only focused on myself.
The Fanatical Focus on Filler Words
I completely understand why public speaking trainers recommend limiting or not using filler words at all in your speech. Filler words, when used excessively, can be very distracting to the audience. They may start to pay attention to your filler words more than your message, which is what we do not want as speakers. If you have a nervous energy, like me, and use filler words excessively in your speech or presentation, the audience may think you are unprepared. Filler words can also decrease your credibility, and the audience may start to think that you’re not well-versed in the subject you’re talking to them about. Filler words can also affect your delivery. Let’s say you are trying to drum up suspense and silence, but you keep filling that silence with an “um” or “uh,” you may take away from that suspense you are trying to create.
My forgiving, lenient take on filler words
I get all of the reasons to limit filler words in your speeches and presentations, and I think it is important to be aware of your filler word usage and how it is affecting the most important parts of your speech: your content, message, organization, and delivery. With that said, I think sometimes we get so caught up in trying to limit our filler words and be perfect that we forget about our content, message and substance. The Er-Ah Counter is a great awareness tool to learn that you are using filler words excessively. However, I think it can be intimidating to new speakers and create a sense of perfectionism that just isn’t necessary.
I have seen and heard many memorable speeches that have been littered with filler words. However, their story/message was so strong that the filler words did not detract from the overall message. One example of this that I will always remember is The Moth story “Hoboken Roast Beef” by Adam Wade. I was taking a free creative writing class, and the instructor sent us the link to listen as an example of creating a wonderful story about everyday, mundane things. As I started listening, I immediately noticed all the filler words and couldn’t believe this was an example of a good story. But a few minutes in, my silly judgements subsided, and I started to enjoy the story. It is an excellent story – very humorous and heartfelt at the same time, and also relatable too! The storyteller’s pace is quick and frantic, which leads to him using more filler words, but that seems to fit his personality and his perspective in the story as well. I love this story and how he tells it! I have not listened to any of his other stories or speeches yet to know if this is his style or it was just this particular story, but either way, he did a great job in creating a memorable story that I still remember even a year later after listening to it.
My argument here is that a good story and message can overcome and surpass even the most excessive use of filler words. Perfectionism (in terms of filler words) does not enhance our speech much. No one in the audience has walked away from a speech saying, “That speech had no filler words in it! It was excellent!” The audience may only notice your filler words if used excessively.
This term excessively is very vague in most public speaking trainings as well because it’s subjective. To me, excessively means if you use a filler word about once a sentence on average. Others will have their own definitions of excessive amount of filler words, but the point is that it’s excessive when it takes away from your content and your message.
If you are a speaker who has been told you use filler words too much, that is certainly something to be aware of. However, take comfort in the lenient view that you don’t have to be perfect and make your speech filler word-free. Focus more on your content, message, organization and delivery, and your audience won’t even notice you had some minor filler words occasionally throughout your speech.
Three strategies to improve your speeches, which will also help you to limit your use of filler words
Perhaps you are someone who uses filler words excessively and wants to improve. If you focus on some of these strategies, then that may help you to improve your filler word problem while also improving your speeches and presentations.
1. WATCH YOUR SPEECH VIDEOS AFTERWARDS
This can be uncomfortable, but it is essential if you want to refine your performance. When you watch yourself, you may realize that you used more filler words than you thought you had. You can also notice where you use filler words more—is it in the beginning and end or more in the middle of your speech? Perhaps you really practiced and had your opening and conclusion down, so you didn’t use fillers words at all, but the middle of your speech isn’t quite as practiced, which leads to you using more filler words inadvertently. Being aware of how many times you use filler words and when you most often use them is your first step in fixing the problem. Watching your speech videos afterwards will also help you to see what is working in your speech and what isn’t in terms of organization and delivery. You can learn how well you are getting your content and message across and how you can improve that for the next time.
2. THE POWER OF THE PAUSE
Filler words usually come up when people are transitioning from one point to another and feel you need to fill the silence. Purposeful silence in speeches, just like in movie theaters, is golden. Use a pause to signify that you are moving on to another thought, paragraph, example, etc. You can also use a pause to add to the suspense and make your audience wonder what will happen next (caveat here: only if this fits your story; if overused, this may be annoying to your audience who wants you to get to the point). The pause can be very powerful when used appropriately. Use it wisely to help you enhance your speech and give you the extra benefit of less filler words.
3. PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE!
I use this saying/mantra a lot in our A-Ha! Method Podcast (probably to an annoying extent), but it’s so true for public speaking and most other things in life. Practice makes progress, and I am trying to force myself to practice more too!
Practice your speech ahead of time. Practice it often. Practice it a lot! Practice in front of an audience, then get some feedback, practice it at home some more, and then give it again. You will get better at your particular speech and presentation the more times you practice, and you will also be more comfortable speaking in front of people in general if you continue to practice in front of an audience. Commonsense I know, but this actually involves a lot of effort and pushing yourself outside your comfort zone, which is easier said than done.
You can practice, practice, practice at one our Speakers Alliance weekly practice sessions. We will focus our feedback on your content, message, organization and delivery, and we will only mention filler words if you use them excessively.
Final feelings about filler words
If you focus on more important aspects of your speech, such as content, message, organization and delivery, then everything else will fall into place, including not using filler words. Let’s stop putting so much pressure on ourselves as speakers to be perfectly polished and start focusing more on our authenticity and the audience takeaways. Filler words are a small part of the presentation, and if you are just focusing on that as a speaker, an evaluator, and even an audience member, then you are missing out on other key areas.
Our stance at Speakers Alliance is that it’s okay to have a few filler words here and there in your speech and presentation if they happen to slip out. Don’t fret if you say a few – keep going with your speech and continue wowing your audience with your incredible story, message and content. That’s what we care about most of all!
Speakers Alliance is here to help with all areas of improving your public speaking. Here are a few resources to check out to take your public speaking to a new level:
Each week the Speakers Alliance runs a FREE Public Speaking and Pitching Practice Clinic for people looking to improve their public speaking skills. Anyone who wants to practice a presentation, speech, sales pitch, social occasion speech, etc. is welcome to join and participate! If you do not have a speech or pitch prepared, you can still attend and listen to others practice and ask questions during the Q&A period.
Talks can be 5-6 minutes long. The panel will provide up to 3-5 minutes of feedback after your talk.
This week, we are offering not one but TWO practice sessions for you to join.
Thursday, 6/10 & 6/17 from 12-1pm PT – REGISTER HERE
Join us on Wednesdays or Thursdays to practice your speeches, presentations and pitches. Speakers Alliance is here to help and support you in your public speaking journey!
In this introduction to, and first episode of The A-Ha! Method Podcast, hosts Gabe Zichermann and Dayna Gowan talk through their own different paths to public speaking and the challenges they faced along the way. We’ll also look at why public speaking can be so hard for people – even those who are exceptionally good at other kinds of communication.
Practice, practice, practice! That is the best way to become a better public speaker.
Each week the Speakers Alliance runs a FREE Speech Practice Clinic for people looking to improve their public speaking skills. Gabe and Dayna will discuss issues of importance, answer questions about professional and personal public speaking skills/techniques, and listen to/critique as many short-form talks as possible. The sessions take place Wednesdays at 6pm Pacific Time, and all are welcome. You can attend as many Wednesday sessions as you would like.
Talks can be 5-6 minutes long. The panel will provide up to 3 minutes of feedback. Speeches must be on a professional topic. If you do not have a speech prepared, you can still attend and listen to others practice and ask questions during the Q&A period.
For 2021, I set a goal for myself to take a comedy sketch writing class. I have been taking improv classes for over a year now, but sketch writing would be a new challenge for me. Whenever a funny scenario comes up in real life, I always say, “That could be an SNL sketch!,” but I never knew where to even start with writing it. In January, I signed up for the online Sketch Writing 101 Class at Rise Comedy. The class was only 4 weeks long with one class each Sunday for 2.5 hours, so it felt like an achievable goal. The first class we were told there would be homework, and we would be expected to write sketches on our own time.
Each class we’d get a sketch assignment, pitch our ideas, and then pick one or two to write in full. At the next class, we would do a read through, give and get feedback and then punch-up (a comedy writer’s term meaning “to improve upon”) the jokes and concept. It was like our very own online writers’ room, and I enjoyed it way more than I thought I would.
During Sketch 101, I wrote a monologue based on my mom, a parody about anti-vaxxers in LA, and a premise-based sketch about a woman who pretends her stuffed animals are real pets on Zoom calls. My portfolio is ready if anyone is interested.
Sketch 201
I enjoyed 101 so much that I signed up for Sketch Writing 201, which started on March 28, 2021 and just wrapped up on April 18, 2021. Sketch 201 involved more collaborative writing with a partner, which was fun to write with different classmates. For 201, I co-wrote with my partners a sketch about 43-year-old ladies who love Disney way too much (this sketch was totally based on my friends and me) and a sketch about 3rd graders on strike at school. Again, my sketch portfolio is ready! SNL, call me! 😃
I really enjoyed 201 as well, and I plan to continue on with 301 when it is offered. I have never taken any creative writing classes before this EVER, and wow, have I been missing out! I loved the creative outlet! I know it will get harder as we start to put together an actual sketch show and cast people for parts, but one step at a time!
Sketch Writing and Public Speaking
As I was going through my sketch classes this year, I couldn’t help but think about how the lessons of sketch comedy apply to public speaking as well. I didn’t take sketch writing to improve my public speaking skills, but I believe some of the key lessons can be helpful to anyone looking to improve their public speaking career, even for non-humorous speeches and presentations.
Here are five lessons learned from Sketch Writing Class that can be applied to public speaking:
Don’t judge yourself, just keep writing!
When you are starting out with a sketch or a topic, just get it all out on the page (aka word vomit or for a more pleasant term — free writing). Don’t let your brain filter you and tell you it’s stupid or not worth writing. Fight against your perfectionist tendencies. Just get it all out on the page, coherent or not, and you can edit later! If you keep it inside your head — like I have done for many sketch and speech ideas — then the world will never see it or hear it. The world needs to hear your message, and we want to hear your message after you have crafted it! The first step though is to get all those ideas down and then you will be able to better organize your ideas and message at that point.
Say “Yes, and…” to build on ideas.
Once you have your ideas on paper, whether written or typed, then start building on those ideas instead of shutting them down. Sketch writing uses the principles of “Yes, and…” from improv to create funny scenarios and situations. Another phrase that gets used a lot is “If this is true, then what else is true?” When I was working with my sketch writing partner, I noticed she used the “Yes, and…” principle very well. Whatever idea I had, usually a stupid pun or joke, she would say, “YES! And then we can do this!” Working with her was so easy and fun! I hope to be able to collaborate with her more in the future!
Point of view
Sketch writing and probably most creative writing classes (I assume) teach you to have a clear point of view. What are the characters’ points of view? What are you trying to say in your sketch? What message are you trying to convey here? All these are good questions to ask yourself as you are writing and planning your next presentation. If it is not clear to you what your message and point(s) of view are, then it won’t be clear to your audience.
Keep it simple!
Once you have your point of view in mind, then keep it simple! This goes for your sketch ideas and dialogue. Don’t hide your jokes. Don’t be cute and coy about it. Make your jokes known and make sure your audience knows they are there. The same thing applies to public speaking with your message. Don’t hide your message or make it difficult for the audience to understand your message. At the same time, keep your message and call to action simple. Instead of a 10 bullet point list of things to do after hearing your speech, keep it short—1-3 points maximum so your audience can remember them and actually use what you taught them.
This is the part of sketch I struggle with the most. Ugh! In sketch class, they had a timeline of the drafts, and by Draft 4, the sketch was usually ready to go to production. That means four rewrites, and I don’t mean just fixing grammatical errors. Draft 1 to Draft 2 could involve totally different characters and premises depending on the feedback you got. Drafts 3 and 4 really focused on joke punch-ups and making sure every line was reviewed and a joke was added if it fit.
I really struggle with rewrites and editing. Gabe Zichermann has a fantastic editing and iterative process, which he outlines in the A-Ha Method Course, but I can honestly say this is a part of my public speaking game that I need to improve ASAP. I have created a bad habit of “one speech and done” at my current Toastmasters club—meaning I give the speech, get feedback, and never really look at or think about the speech again. While that has helped me to get over my fear of public speaking, it will not help me much as a paid presenter. This is a top priority of mine right now as a speaker, and I am committed to working on this.
Your speech and presentation may need a lot of edits and time at first. However, it will be absolutely worth all the effort put in when you finally give that amazing presentation, and your audience understands and loves your message.
These lessons from sketch class have served me well, and I hope they will help you too!
Overall, sketch writing class has taught me to not take myself too seriously and to be silly just for the sake of being silly. Sometimes the best sketches (Chopping Broccoli and Spartan Cheerleaders for example) are the most memorable because they are just so silly and fun. I also love the timely political sketches and the sketches that call me out directly (Zillow SNL commercial and Murder Shows SNL song), but the simpler the sketch, the better!
There are so many great lessons to learn from creative writing that can be applied to public speaking. I hope you will take some of these lessons and apply them when preparing your next presentation. And to challenge yourself, I encourage you to try a creative writing class of any sort to generate more ideas for your future speeches. It doesn’t have to be comedy if that’s not your thing, but find a class that works for you and will help you improve your skills. Be creative, and your presentations and your audience will reap the benefits!
Big shout out and thank you to Nick Armstrong and the Rise Comedy Theater for an excellent and inspiring round of sketch writing classes! I am ready and excited for Sketch 301!
Over the past 7 years, I have been working to overcome my gripping and limiting fear of public speaking. After pushing myself out of my comfort zone and making public speaking improvement a priority, I have found that the benefits of liking and, dare I say, even loving public speaking instead of hating and fearing it are ABSOLUTELY LIFE CHANGING! Here is my story.
Scared.
Nervous.
Shaky hands.
Shaky legs.
Shaky voice.
Face turning bright red like a tomato.
Mind going blank and having no idea what I am saying.
All I want to do is get the presentation over with and sit back down where no one can see me.
That is how I felt during every presentation and speech before I conquered my fear of public speaking.
I always knew I wasn’t a good speaker and presenter – throughout middle school, high school, college, grad school. It just wasn’t my thing. I always struggled with it anytime I had to get in front of a room, and therefore, I hated it and always got nervous anytime a presentation project was mentioned in one of my classes. I had so many theories as to why I wasn’t good at it. For example: I thought I just wasn’t born with this natural ability to speak in front of a crowd like others were. I also thought maybe I would suddenly find this magical confidence at age 35. Why 35? I don’t know, but in my mid-20’s it seemed like an age where I hoped I would stop caring what others thought and be comfortable in my skin. No matter what I did, this fear and anxiety followed me from school projects to my professional life, and I finally had enough.
Where this fear all started
D.A.R.E. Graduation in 5th grade
The D.A.R.E. (Drug Abuse Resistance Education) program involved police officers going to schools and teaching students about the dangers of drugs, alcohol and violence. Their main message, at least in 1998, was to just say “NO!” to all these substances, especially marijuana – a gateway drug to all the other drugs out there. (I’ll save my commentary on that line of thinking for another time.)
After students completed the D.A.R.E. graduation curriculum, they would hold a Graduation Ceremony where students had to say “NO!” to Drugs in front of their parents and family members. I gave it everything I had when I auditioned for the emcee role for the Graduation Ceremony, and I got it! I was probably the only one who tried out for the role, but I was still so excited!
Then the day came for the event. Armed with my index cards in hand, I got up to the microphone in front of the audience, and I froze! I could feel all the eyes on me, the silence was killer, and my hands and legs started shaking uncontrollably. I got terrible, awful stage fright, and I was so upset! This is my first memory of feeling this debilitating stage fright and anxiousness.
I blame D.A.R.E. for all my public speaking woes — not really, but it feels good to have someone else to blame for this problem. Because of the D.A.R.E. program, I struggled for 15 years with addiction. I was addicted… to saying “NO!” to public speaking. That’s my terrible joke, and I am sticking to it.
Since that terrifying time up on stage in 5th grade, I STRUGGLED with public speaking. Middle school, high school, college, grad school – every time I had to give a presentation, I hated it. Even doing introductions on the first day of class had my heart feeling like it was going to pump out of my chest. “Hi, my name is Dayna LeBlanc, and I am taking this course…because it’s required.” Why was that so hard to say??
I dreaded Speech 101 in college, but I luckily made it through that class with an A because only a percentage of the grade was actually based on your speaking ability. My ability to write outlines, complete projects, and study for tests was just fine. My first speech in Speech 101 class was a 4-minute speech on something that has influenced you. I decided to talk about my experience as a senior in high school in New Orleans when Hurricane Katrina hit — a topic I could for sure find four minutes worth of material to talk about. Four minutes seemed like an eternity to me, but when I got up to speak, I ignored my whole outline, went off script (aka rambled), and I ended up talking for 11.5 minutes. There were no timing lights to tell me I was way over time, only the slowly dropping faces of my classmates, who were shocked and overwhelmed at this long, run-on sentence of a story. I got a B+ on the assignment, most likely because the instructor either felt bad for the subject matter of my speech or me as the speaker or both.
My Last Straw Moment
I thought this was a problem that would just plague me in school — maybe I just got nervous in front of my peers, despite the many pep talks I would give myself. “I don’t care what they think about me. I am going to get up and give this presentation and not care at all what they think,” I would tell myself before my presentations. Maybe I didn’t really care what they thought of me, but when I got up in front of them, I sure worried if they could tell how nervous I was. I thought when I got out into the real world that I would be fine — completely poised and professional. But this theory was quickly proven wrong.
Three months into getting my dream job as an Employee Wellness Coordinator at a well-known insurance company in South Carolina, I had to give a wellness presentation to our HR department. The presentation was about Stress Management, and I worked for many days on prepping the slides and my talking points. The day of the presentation, I ran into my manager beforehand, and he told me the HR manager for the group I was presenting to was a Distinguished Toastmaster. I had no idea what that was, but I was 100x more intimidated after that. The pre-speech “I’m not nervous at all” pep talk went out the window, and I became overwhelmed with nerves.
During the presentation, I committed all the big public speaking blunders:
I didn’t introduce myself or my co-worker who came with me, and we were both new to the company,
I talked about how nervous I was — how fitting for a stress management presentation,
And I went way over time – about 15-20 minutes over.
In hindsight, no one died and probably no one who attended that presentation, except for me, remembers how bad it was, but that was the last straw.
After the presentation, I went back to my office, ran to the bathroom and cried. I was so upset that this fear and anxiety of public speaking had followed me from school to my professional life. I was so tired of not getting my message across when presenting and feeling terrible about my performance afterwards. I decided something had to change. I had to get over this crippling fear, for the sake of my career and my well-being.
How I Conquered My Fear
I thought about the Distinguished Toastmaster title — whatever that meant — and I decided to look up Toastmasters. Fortunately, my company had a corporate Toastmasters club that met every Thursday during lunchtime, so I decided to check it out. I visited as a guest for a month or so, and then in October 2014, I made it official and joined as a member. My department paid for my membership, which was nice and supportive. I gave my Icebreaker speech a few weeks after joining. I talked about 2 things that influenced me throughout my life — no, not Hurricane Katrina this time, that was my 2nd speech topic — I talked about my love for volleyball and running. I had nine umms and uhhhs, relied fully on my notes, used lots of unnecessary hand gestures, had a red blotchy face and neck afterwards, and I had to rush my conclusion to stay within timeframe, but I got through it. And no crying in the bathroom afterwards at least!
I gave at least one speech a month, and in June 2015, I had given 10 speeches to reach my Competent Communicator designation. By that 10th speech, I had ZERO filler words, index cards that I didn’t end up using, purposeful movements, and a polished, effective conclusion. I had really pushed myself to get up there and give these speeches, and I found that I enjoyed it, even though I still struggled with it. I wasn’t where I wanted to be, but I was a whole lot better than when I started.
My Public Speaking Journey
Six and a half years later, I am still in Toastmasters, and I am enjoying getting to share my stories and practice my content. I also really enjoy hearing others share their stories. In this time, I have accomplished so many goals I NEVER thought I would reach. I got my Distinguished Toastmaster (DTM) designation, meaning I gave over 50 speeches and served in leadership roles, and it took me about five years to do that.
I also competed in contests, which is something I never thought I would do. When I watched the World Championship of Public Speaking Finals as a new Toastmaster, I would think, “I could never do that!” Although I haven’t reached the Finals (yet), I have competed in smaller level contests and won! I won 2nd place in the District 58 Evaluation Contest in 2017, which meant I had to give a 2-3-minute evaluation of a speech. The fact that I am competing and putting myself through these contests is such a win in itself, I don’t really care what place I get, although it is nice to win every now and then.
I also served in leadership roles within my clubs, and I have now served as Club President and other roles for three different clubs. When I was Club President for the first time in 2017-2018, I could see my newfound leadership skills and confidence slowly start to transfer from my Toastmaster meetings to my professional work. I started speaking up in meetings more and advocating for myself and my needs as an employee and also the needs of the department. I started to be viewed as a leader within my department, even though I didn’t have the manager or supervisor title.
It truly is life changing to not be afraid of public speaking or being put on the spot. I don’t second-guess myself (as much) anymore, and I am no longer surprised by this confident person (me!) speaking up and leading meetings. I have embraced this confidence level I never thought I would have, and I have allowed it to take me to new heights — all before the age of 35 too! Another one of my why-I’m-so-bad-at-public-speaking theories now disproven. I have now tried things I never thought I would be able to do, such as lead conference calls and now video calls effectively, give speeches at weddings and funerals, take improv classes, take sketch writing classes, and much more!
What’s next?
I wish I could say the nerves are completely gone and exterminated, but they still show up every now and again. I get upset when the nerves creep into my speeches, but I am much more in control now of my speaking abilities.
I have lots of dreams and goals — I am going to start giving paid presentations as a side business, and I want to continue getting better at improv and sketch writing. It’s absolutely mind boggling how the girl who got so nervous at any mention of a speech or having to speak in front of a crowd now wants to do it as a career. And the fun comedy outlets would never have happened without my firm public speaking foundation and confidence to throw myself into a challenge and try something new. The sky is the limit here, and the only person who can hold me back from achieving my goals is me.
Does public speaking make you nervous?
I often don’t believe it when someone else says it, but it’s so true in this instance – “If I can conquer my fear of public speaking, you can too!” It takes a lot of courage to step outside your comfort zone and make public speaking improvement a priority, but when you do, you will find more than just growth. You will find life-changing confidence that you never thought you would have in your wildest dreams. This new confidence can take you to new heights in your job, your business, and your life if you let it. And this newfound confidence can come at any age too!
There are many ways to overcome your fears of public speaking, and the most important thing is to find the way that works best for you. Toastmasters helped me a ton, but there is a certain level of commitment that takes a lot of time to see results, so it doesn’t work for everyone. If you need quick help overcoming your fears and improving your public speaking skills, check out the online course “Public Speaking in a Time of Distraction: The A-Ha! Method” by award-winning instructor Gabe Zichermann.
We will soon start offering community sessions for course participants to practice their presentations and receive feedback – both helping to overcome those fears and make their presentations and pitches more effective. You can take the course at your leisure and put the included resources to use when you need them the most. Sign up for this helpful professional speaking course today!
Picture credit: Toastmasters Santa Monica Club 21
It has been a long and incredibly tough journey to overcome my fear of public speaking. I am so grateful I did, and I can’t wait to see how far I can go now that I am no longer afraid to speak in front of people.
